For they claim that Israel is using rats to drive Arab families out of their homes in the Old City.

Dozens of settlers have brought iron cages full of rats to the ancient alleyways, alleges the Palestinian news agency Wafa. They then "release the rats, which find shelter in open sewage systems".

Jerusalem Municipality spokesman Gidi Schmerling describes the report as "pure fiction".

To back up his denial, let's remember that the Wafa news agency - controlled by PA President Mahmoud Abbas' office - once laughably accused Israel of using wild pigs to drive Palestinians out of their homes and fields in the West Bank.

So we say "rats" to the Palestinians' ludicrous claim. Apart from the cartoon Ratatouille which opened last year's Jerusalem Film Festival, as far as we know the only rodents there are human ones.

Oh, Gord! Hebrew is mangled

OOPS: Brown mispronounces Hebrew in the Knesset

GORDON Brown's father John was a thoroughly decent chap. He was a lifelong friend of Israel. He chaired the Church of Scotland's Israel Committee. And he visited the country at least twice a year.

He even learned Hebrew. What a shame, therefore, that he didn't teach his son.

For the British premier made a gallant attempt at Hebrew when he addressed the Knesset. Gordon admirably attempted to utter a phrase of greeting at the start of his speech and to quote Theodor Herzl at the end.

But, sadly, he rather mangled both. Indeed, his pronunciations were not confined to Ivrit. His references to "Auschwitz" came out as "Ouchwhich". And Jerusalem became "Je-usalem".

Still, It must have been a rare pleasure for Brown to be visiting a country where the prime minister is significantly less popular than he is. And he made a sterling speech in defence of the Jewish state.

Pity though that he repeated the same story about his father's cine films of Israel which he's told so many times to Jewish audiences that BBC repeats seem like new material.

Israeli troops to go 'glatt'

LET'S hope it will never be necessary. But if Israeli troops have to go into battle again, they'll do so with glatt kosher food.

For among their kit, infantrymen are to carry Meal Marts - small white boxes containing chicken, turkey and kebab among other delights.

The American-prepared meals - costing £2 apiece - have a shelf life of three years.

They are cooked inside an aluminium tray by a chemical that automatically heats up when mixed with a little water.

We always knew that an army marches on its stomach. In Israel it'll be doing so on a glatt kosher one.

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